Wife: Honey, would you mind clearing the garden for me?
Spouse: Do I appear to be a landscaper?
SLAZY PARTNER! (HAHA STORY)
Spouse: I’m sorry, sweetie. So, how about we take care of the bathroom door?
Spouse: Do I appear to be a carpenter?
The spouse leaves the tasks unfinished when he leaves. Later, he comes back to find the bathroom door mended and the lawn well-kept.
Wife: I knew she would take care of things on her own!
Wife: I wasn’t the one responsible.
Wife: Honestly? Who then carried it out?
Wife: The woman next door.
Spouse: What was the amount you gave him?
Wife: He had no desire for money. I have two choices from him now: bread or sex.
Spouse: I hope you fed him some bread!
Wife: Do I appear to be from a bakery?
Young Man Notices A Lady Following Him
A young man noticed an elderly lady following him around while shopping in a supermarket. She stopped when he stopped and kept staring at him. Eventually, at the checkout, she approached him and said, “I hope I haven’t made you feel ill at ease; it’s just that you look so much like my late son.”
The man replied, “That’s okay.”
She then made an unusual request: “I know it’s silly, but if you’d call out, ‘Goodbye, Mom’ as I leave the store, it would make me so happy.”
Obligingly, as she left, the man called out, “Goodbye Mom!” She waved and smiled back.
Feeling pleased for brightening her day, the man proceeded to pay for his groceries. The clerk said, “That comes to $121.85.”
Surprised, the man exclaimed, “How come so much! I only bought 5 items.”
The clerk replied, “Yeah, but your mother said you’d be paying for her things too.”
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