The actual question is, will you be among the 96% of those who can use this military technique to fall asleep in two minutes?
All of us have experienced it, or at least, those of us who experience high levels of anxiety have. As we lay in bed, exhausted beyond belief, our minds raced, making it impossible for us to go asleep. We reached for the sinister blue lights on our phones, thinking to ourselves, “If only there was a way to fall asleep instantly?”
It turns out that there is, albeit given who I am, I’ll probably be in the unfortunate four percent for which it doesn’t work. Nevertheless, perhaps there is still hope for you.
Though science hasn’t yet developed a “on-off” switch for our brains, there is a military sleep technique that may be the next best thing.
Fitness instructor Justin Agustin used his platform to spread the word about this technique, which he claims works for an astounding 96 percent of individuals and can even put you to sleep in under two minutes.
How then does it operate?
The US Army, it seems, created the method primarily for “fighter pilots who need 100% of their reflexes” and for combatants who must be able to nod off in noisy, demanding environments.
You will go to sleep in a matter of minutes if you settle in and pay attention to your breathing.
Once you’ve mastered that area, you may begin to’shut it down’ by gradually relaxing your entire body, beginning with your forehead and facial features.
Make every effort to ensure that nothing is tight and that your arms are relaxed by your sides.
Feel the warmth rising from your head to your fingertips. Then, relax your chest by taking a deep breath; then, relax your thigh, stomach, legs, and feet.
You must visualize the warm feeling traveling from your heart to your toes.
Finally, the difficult portion.
Ideally, you should be free of any tension in order to aid in your own sleep.
Picture yourself in a cozy spot, such as curled up in a velvet hammock or relaxing on a heated boat on a serene lake.
For 10 seconds, tell yourself to “don’t think” if you are experiencing intrusive thoughts about the time you told a waiter to enjoy your dinner and you feel like you’re thinking about something else.
Hopefully, you will be able to fall asleep after this.
Though Agustin’s video may seem too wonderful to be true, comments on it show that there is some validity to the approach.
“I’m a military brat and was taught this,” one commenter said. This was also taught by a seasoned psychology professor I had in college. It is undoubtedly effective.”
Another said: “Pretty sure this is closer to what is called Progressive Muscle Relaxation which was developed by an American physician in 1908.”
And that’s it – pleasant dreams!
My Neighbor Kept Hanging out Her Panties Right in Front of My Son’s Window, So I Taught Her a Real Lesson
My neighbor’s undergarments became the unlikely stars of a suburban show, taking center stage right outside my 8-year-old son’s window. When Jake innocently asked if her thongs were some kind of slingshots, I knew the “panty parade” had to stop, and it was time for a lesson in laundry discretion.
Ah, suburbia—where the lawns are pristine, the air smells of fresh-cut grass, and life rolls along smoothly until someone comes along to shake things up. That’s when Lisa, our new neighbor, arrived. Life had been relatively peaceful until laundry day revealed something I wasn’t prepared for: a rainbow of her underwear flapping outside Jake’s window like flags at a questionable parade.One afternoon, I was folding Jake’s superhero underwear when I glanced out the window and almost choked on my coffee. There they were: hot pink, lacy, and very much on display. My son, ever curious, peered over my shoulder and asked the dreaded question, “Mom, why does Mrs. Lisa have her underwear outside? And why do some of them have strings? Are they for her pet hamster?”
Between stifled laughter and mortified disbelief, I did my best to explain. But Jake’s imagination was running wild, wondering if Mrs. Lisa was secretly a superhero,with underwear designed for aerodynamics. He even wanted to join in, suggesting his Captain America boxers could hang next to her “crime-fighting gear.” It became a daily routine—Lisa’s laundry would wave in the breeze, and Jake’s curiosity would stir. But when he asked if he could hang his own underwear next to hers, I knew it was time to put an end to this spectacle. So, I marched over to her house, ready to resolve the situation diplomatically. Lisa answered the door, and before I could say much, she made it clear she wasn’t about to change her laundry habits for anyone. She laughed off my concerns, suggesting I “loosen up” and even offered me advice on spicing up my own wardrobe. Frustrated but determined, I came up with a plan—a brilliantly petty one. That evening, I created the world’s largest, most garish pair of granny panties out of the brightest fabric I could find. The next day, when Lisa left, I hung my masterpiece right in front of her window. When she returned, the sight of the massive flamingo-patterned undergarments nearly knocked her off her feet. Watching her fume while trying to yank down my prank was worth every stitch. She eventually caved, agreeing to move her laundry somewhere less visible—while I quietly relished my victory. From then on, Lisa’s laundry vanished from our shared view, and peace was restored. As for me? I ended up with a pair of flamingo-themed curtains, a daily reminder of the day I won the great laundry war of suburbia.
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